Once again, The Washington Post has published the winning submissions to its  yearly neologism contest, in which readers are asked to supply alternate meanings for common words.
1. Coffee (n.), the person upon whom one coughs.
2. Flabbergasted (adj.), appalled over how much weight you have gained.
3. Abdicate (v.), to give up all hope of ever [...]

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The little old couple walked slowly into McDonalds that cold winter evening.
They looked out of place amid the young families and young couples eating there that night. Some of the customers looked admiringly at them. You could tell what the admirers were thinking. “Look, there is a couple who has been through a lot together, [...]

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1. Kidnappers are not very interested in you. 

2. In a hostage situation you are likely to be released first. 
3. No one expects you to run–anywhere. 

4. People call at 9 PM and ask, did I wake you? 

5. People no longer view you as a hypochondriac.
6. There is nothing left to learn the hard way. 

7. Things you [...]

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The best and wisest doctor. Lead a moderate lifestyle and make the most out of your life. The ending is the same, it is the journey that matters.
Q: Doctor,  I’ve heard that  cardiovascular exercise can prolong life.  Is this true?  
A: Your heart is only  good for so many beats, and thats it…don’t waste them on [...]

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