The Washington Post had a contest, in which respondents had to write a two-line romantic poem…except that the last line had to be as unromantic…. as the first line was romantic.
1. My darling, my lover, my beautiful wife,
Marrying you screwed up my life.
2. I see your face when I am dreaming.
That’s why I [...]

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A far more realistic account of the events of that fateful morning….
Baby bear goes downstairs, sits in his small chair at the table.
He looks into his small bowl. It is empty. ‘Who’s been eating my porridge?’ he squeaks.
Daddy Bear arrives at the big table and sits in his big chair. He looks into his big [...]

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These classifieds actually ran in a Minneapolis newspaper – a smile for your day… 
FREE YORKSHIRE TERRIER . 
8-years old. Hateful little bastard. Bites! 

FREE PUPPIES: 
1/2 Cocker Spaniel, 1/2 sneaky neighbor’s dog. 

FREE PUPPIES.. 
Mother, AKC German Shepherd. 
Father, Super Dog..able to leap tall fences in a single bound. 

FOUND DIRTY WHITE DOG. 
Looks like a rat. Been out a while. 
Better be a big [...]

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“$5.37” That’s what the kid behind the counter at Taco Bell said to me.
I dug into my pocket and pulled out some lint and two dimes and something that used to be a Jolly Rancher.
Having already handed the kid a five-spot, I started to head back out to the truck to grab some change when [...]

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