If I were a rockin’ Santa,
You know what I’d do?
I’d dump the silly gifts
That are given to you.
I’d deliver some things
Just inside your front door
Things you have lost,
But treasured before.
I’d give you back all
Your maidenly vigor,
And to go along with it,
A neat, tiny figure;
Then restore the old color
That once graced your hair
Before rinses and bleaches
Took [...]

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The couple were 85 years old, and had been married for sixty years. Though they were far from rich, they managed to get by because they watched their pennies.
Though not young, they were both in very good health, largely due to the wife’s insistence on healthy foods and exercise for the last decade.
One [...]

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John was in the fertilized egg business. He had several hundred young layers (hens), called “pullets,” and ten roosters to fertilize the eggs.
He kept records, and any rooster not performing went into the soup pot and was replaced.
This took a lot of time, so he bought some tiny bells and attached them to his roosters.
Each [...]

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~Your kids are becoming you….and you don’t like them
….but your grandchildren are perfect!
~Going out is good.
Coming home is better!
When people say you look “Great”…
they add “for your age!”
~When you needed the discount you paid full price.
Now you get discounts on everything…
movies, hotels, flights.
~You forget names … but it’s [...]

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